In hopes you call my name

My Latest Posts

  • Attempt
    In an attempt to live past the day, of course I failed yet again trying to not think about all the little things subconsciously. If I had a dollar to collect all the attempt I tried to forget everything, I would probably not be struggling financially right now. But standing through my motto of leavingContinue reading “Attempt”
  • Long
    Its been so long since I ever type another entry. Too busy and caught up with things, and focusing on finding my self-worth. It is still hard because recollections just keep on passing by, and everywhere I go, is still so hard for me. Nothing really comes easy, and days just keep on passing byContinue reading “Long”
  • I hope it changes
    In hopes that you’ll read this, this one is for you Today, I keep on telling myself that I have to be so much better than this. What more can I expect if nothing comes in our way? When I have much more important things to prioritise, why do I still bother to reach outContinue reading “I hope it changes”
  • Missing you
    It sucks because I can only pretend that everything is going to be okay without you. And it has to, right? I cannot live off all on you and I cannot depend on you all the time. I miss you but theres nothing I can do. I watched and waited you from far. It hurtsContinue reading “Missing you”
  • Next
    If this ever get to you, I hope you know. Maybe you know him much longer than me. Or just so much more than me. Maybe I can never experience the things you have experienced with him. Maybe the pain you got from the past makes you think who you are now is open enoughContinue reading “Next”
  • Pain
    Today I felt the immense pain ever. Maybe its what I deserve. When I don’t want to show my stress or vent my frustration to anyone, I clean. So that is what I did today. I clean and reorganise the store room for the..I really don’t know I can’t count. It was such a mess.Continue reading “Pain”
  • Dear Baby
    It has already been 18 weeks right now and I can’t be more than grateful to be in this lovely journey. But one day somehow, I’d wish you would understand the real journey behind this pregnancy. Mummy will always be here to support you in whatever life decision you make, but I don’t want, andContinue reading “Dear Baby”
  • (no title)
    I just needed you to tell me that everything will be okay. Thats all I needed to hear. I know all of this is never easy for me. For you or for us. I just needed to hear you. But you kept on pushing me down and doubting me for every single thing that IContinue reading
  • Hope
    I wish I could believe in this. I wish you would at least have some hope for us. I doubt that. Hope never really exist. I keep on believing that it will someday, but I’m almost exhausted. I want to keep on trying, but I do fear, I don’t know what to do, I amContinue reading “Hope”
  • Feud
    Getting in touch with you was never easy. And it is almost like a battle to keep you noted of all the progress I’ve been trying to put myself into. My life so far indeed has been changing, and at this point, I am still clueless as to what I should start with. Today marksContinue reading “Feud”